Learning Russian is no walk in Gorky Park, something I suppose most of you are already more than well aware of. Often we talk about the difficulties of this language, we try to sort out verbs of motions and what not, but when was the last time you heard someone talk about how much fun it is? Because it is fun! Learning a new language is more than simply getting a new set of foreign words and grammatical rules, it is giving yourself another way of expressing yourself, new emotions to go with those new words, new jokes to make with the help of those grammatical rules. I have long suspected that the main reason as to why I spent so many hours slaving over my homework when I was studying «русский язык как иностранный» [Russian as a foreign language] in Omsk, Siberia, was because nobody laughed at my jokes. To make people laugh I had to learn how to be funny in Russian. (Yes, it took more time than just managing to say «Сколько стоит вон та булка серого хлеба?» [How much does that loaf of dark bread over there cost?] or «Можно воспользоваться вашим туалетом?» [May I use your restroom?] but it was definitely worth it!) With time you’ll come to know that the person you were when speaking Spanish back in school has nothing to do with the person who memorized Pushkin’s famous poem «Я вас любил». Speaking of funny, today I came across an interview with a teacher of Russian language as a foreign language , and especially her answer to the last one of the seven questions posed to her made me laugh out loud.

forbiddentoswim.jpg

In situations like these knowledge of Russian is imperative. If not aware that the message of the sign «купаться запрещено» means ‘to bathe is forbidden’ one could easily have done like everyone else on the beach and had a dip in the heavily polluted Siberian river of Иртыш [Irtysh].


This is how Larisa Osipova answered question number 7:

Обычно на уроках иностранного языка бывает много курьёзов. [Usually in foreign language classes there are many funny situations.] Над чем вы в последний раз смеялись? [At what did you laugh most recently?]

Да, часто возникают сложности с буквальным переводом. [Yes, often occurs difficulties with literal translation.] Недавно мой англоговорящий студент перевёл слово «паб» — public house — как «публичный дом». [Recently my English-speaking student translated the word “pub” – public house – as “brothel” (‘public house’ means ‘brothel’ when translated literally into Russian)]. «Вы знаете, — говорит, — англичане так любят публичные дома: там они обсуждают очень важные проблемы. [“You know,” he says, “English people love their brothels so much: there they dicuss very important problems.”] Эти публичные дома так давно существуют в Англии, и мы их так любим». [These brothels have existed for so long in England, and we love them so much.]

I tried and I tried to figure out funny things like that, literal translations I made when just starting out learning Russian, but it seems my mind is blank today. Maybe someone else would like to share a funny mistake they’ve made, like the one above? (Or perhaps someone actually also made the mistake above?)