Another totally awesome post by our resident guest blogger – Adam.
We will get back to being cool in Poland in my next post. This time, inspired by the adventures of some newbies to Poland, I would like to tackle the issue of being polite.
The rules on how you behave vary from country to country. In Britain, for instance, it is customary to acknowledge the presence of another person, but try not to be invasive. There you would be asked, “How are you?” and you would reply that everything is fine. Which is their way of saying hello.
This would be unthinkable in Poland.
In Poland you should only ask how someone is (jak się masz?), only if you REALLY care. Not just to say hello. Because you will hear the real answer. And you can hear any sort of answer.
Some people might go into very personal details of their family situation, finance, health, or whatever – which might make you feel uncomfortable. The most common and the most polite way in Poland is to complain. If anyone ever asks you how you are, here is a list of popular complaints:
- - to co się dzieje w polityce przechodzi ludzkie pojęcie! (politics is going mad!)
- - mam bóle głowy (I have headaches)
- - te dziury w drogach, nie da się żyć w tym kraju (look at the potholes, it’s impossible to live in this country)
- - przez te korki marnuję pół dnia! (I’m wasting half a day stuck in traffic!)
- - szef mnie nie lubi (my boss doesn’t like me)
- - jak tu utrzymać trójkę dzieci, kiedy płacą ludziom marne grosze (how does one feed three kids when they pay you peanuts)
- - nic ciekawego nie pokazują w telewizji (there’s nothing good on tv these days)
And on the other hand, the worst social faux-pas is to brag. You should never talk about how great your financial situation is, how wonderful your life is, how much your partner loves you, or your newest promotion – especially to a person you don’t know very well, like a neighbor. People just will be stunned, or think you’re a bouffon. If there is nothing bad going on in your life, which you could complain about, go for “jako tako” (I’m doing so-so) or “okej” (O.K.).
The correct way to say hello in Poland is to actually say hello. Dzień dobry (good morning), dobry wieczór (good evening), cześć (hi!), witam (hi!). And remember the golden rule: don’t care – don’t ask. If you want to be polite to a stranger, make some general observation – about the weather, surroundings, or recent news.
Another thing an English speaker should keep in mind, is that the Polish language sounds monotonous. The accent almost always falls on the second-to-last syllable. There is little variation in intonation or melody. Therefore, when a Polish person asks a question, expresses sympathy or compassion – not much of this is reflected in the tone of their voice. A simple question “Może jeszcze herbaty?” (would you like more tea?) might sound rude.
Most of our readers are probably well aware of the custom of addressing grown-ups as Pan/Pani (Sir/Madam) rather than ty (you). However, if you meet someone who is addressed in a special way due to their position or occupation, it is polite if you do it, too. Here’s an example: if you meet a priest (ksiądz), even though you are an atheist (ateista), it would be polite to address him as “ksiądz” rather than Pan: “Proszę księdza…“, “Co słychać u księdza?“, etc.
Anyway, jak się macie czytelnicy i czytelniczki Polskiego Bloga? 
