Dutch Blog

The last couple of days I’ve been searching the internet, trying to find an interesting topic to write about. Since I usually write short fiction stories and not non-fictional articles, I find it takes a bit of readjusting, similar to some kind of cultural shock!

I stumbled across a website about non-Dutch people living in the Netherlands. I never knew what a negative image most people have about the Netherlands or the Dutch!

Overall the members of that website were really generalising the Dutch, as if we are all the same.

Now, I can tell you right now, that in the eyes of the Dutch, I’m an oddball as well.

An outsider. On the other hand, Urkers feel the same way about all the other various Dutch people. Outsiders. Not one of the group. It’s a battle between regions.

When I went to school in Emmeloord, it was a given that Urkers would not get along with Lemsters (people living in the village Lemmer) or other Frisians. True, most of the kids from the concerned regions acted that way, but there certainly were notable exceptions.

I could get along quite well with certain girls from Lemmer, there were also a few girls I could not get along with.

Look at the different states in America. Aren’t some people from one state biased about people in another state? Isn’t it really the same everywhere?

So, if people can be so different, even when living in the same country, why do so many people think we are al alike?

Stereotyping.

An American guy is usually pictured with big sunglasses, a cowboy hat, cowboy boots and a godawfull over the top accent.

English are pictured in immaculate suits, bowler hats and a stiff upper lip

The Japanese are almost always pictured with squinted eyes, yellow tan and a huge photo camera.

Think about the Netherlands and you immediately picture those grand mills, rustic farms, tulips, wooden shoes (clogs) and hashish. Yeah, you did, didn’t you!

I guess there’s just not really a way around stereotyping. I think it happens everywhere around the globe and to be honest, the Dutch really do have some quirky habits.

Some even I find strange, others seem just so normal to me I can’t understand why other people would find them strange.

One example?

Okay, how about the famous: Going Dutch?

You must have heard about it. Friends go to a restaurant and at the end of the evening, when it’s time to pay, each person pays their part of the total amount.

Call me a dumb or quirky Dutch person, but can someone explain to me why this is so strange, even frowned upon by so many people?

I mean, lets say you go to a restaurant with a bunch of friends (say, seven) and each friend orders at least a 50 euro plate and each friend orders for about 50 euro’s of drinks.

The bill would be 700 euro’s. I don’t know about you, but I don’t even have that kind of money sitting idly about in my bank account! At the end of my salary, there’s still a large portion of month to go.

So out of real and honest curiosity; at the end of the evening, who picks up the tab or should pick up the tab?

And yes, when I answer the phone, I don’t say ‘Hello’, I say my family name. If I received a nickel for every person who dialled the wrong number, or asked my name in the rare case I did say ‘Hello’, I’d be a very wealthy woman right now!

To prepare myself for this Dutch blog, I decided to do a bit of research about the Dutch language. Don’t worry, I won’t bore you to tears with the dry facts. Besides, the most important facts can be found on the ‘Overview of the Dutch language’ page of Transparent.com.

Though I would like to address one point of criticism on this page, I’m not going to give you a detailed history lesson in the language (unless you would like this of course, in that case I can always go back to this subject).

Anyway, the point of criticism is that, on the above mentioned page, you’ll find the comment that Hollands is a reminder that the language ‘evolved’ from the dialect of the old province of Holland.

Yes, people in other countries often use the word ‘Hollands’ when they refer to the Dutch language, but in the Netherlands itself (Holland is not the entire country, but indeed an old province) Hollands is just another dialect among the many. But it is true that this particular dialect is closest to the ‘standard Dutch language’ than any other dialect.

Before I continue this blog, I feel I must give you a warning that I am not an American who studied the language. I’m native Dutch, so I am less concerned with all the grammar rules than those who actually learn Dutch as a second language. Because I’m not American, it will be hard for me (I think) to make detailed comparisons between the two languages, but I will certainly try my best to give you an in-depth explanation for whatever problem you may have with the grammar or spelling. Besides, what better way to learn Dutch than with the aid of a true blue native Dutch person, right?

But I’m digressing from the topic. Come to think of it, I digressed from the real topic from the get go but I do feel this was a point I wanted to make clear.

Why the topic of ‘A living language?’.

Well, I started to think about the main problems that might arise while learning this language.

The first of three things that came to my mind, was the difference in ‘sounds’ of certain letters. Like the pronunciation of the G, R and the long A (aa). Even though Dutch is sometimes called the bridge language between German (Duits) and English (Engels) since all three derive from the same West-Germanic language, there is still a huge difference in the sounds of these languages. In my personal opinion, German is the roughest sounding of the three, followed by the softer Dutch and then the softest of the three: English.

Second, the fact that Dutch is very much a living language. It is not a set in stone language and when looking at the earliest examples of written Dutch, you can only come to the conclusion that it has very little to do with the Dutch of today.

While Americans may still claim to understand the original writings of Shakespeare, I cannot make the same claim for the next writing, submitted ages ago by a monk.

“Hebban olla vogala nestas hagunnan, hinase hi(c) (e)nda thu uu(a)t unbida(n) uu(e) nu”

Can you read it? I sure can’t!

First, to translate to modern Dutch: “Alle vogels zijn met hun nesten begonnen, behalve jij en ik. Waar wachten we nog op?”

Translated: “All the birds have started to build their nests, except for you and I. What are we waiting for?

Ah, it’s from a romantic poem. It’s quite different from the usual: ik hou van jou en ik blijf je trouw (I love you and I’ll always be faithful to you) is it not?

Yes, languages change and this is certainly true for Dutch. New words come, old words go. New rules are introduced, old rules are forgotten, because language is an item we use and change to current demands and needs. Add to this the fact that the rules don’t apply the same way in every Dutch region. And the most difficult, when old rules disappear, there are those clinging to these rules and those embracing the new rules. Therefore, it’s not always easy to say why and how you made a mistake.

The last thing that came to mind was the fact that… to be completely honest… Dutch just doesn’t make sense! If you really think about it, forget about what people may claim about the language, it just does not make sense!

You doubt me? Take a look at the following Dutch ‘poem’. It can’t really be translated because it relates mostly to the irregularity in the Dutch verbs and nouns. I hope, even if you don’t understand it all, you can see what problems you might encounter in the Dutch language. Some of these conjugations are correct, others are not.

Men spreekt van één lot, en verschillende loten,
maar ‘t meervoud van pot is natuurlijk geen poten.
Zo zegt men ook altijd één vat en twee vaten,
maar zult u ook zeggen: één kat en twee katen?
Laatst ging ik vliegen, dus zeg ik vloog.
Maar zeg nu bij wiegen beslist niet: ik woog,
want woog is nog altijd afkomstig van wegen,
maar is dan ‘ik voog’ een vervoeging van vegen?

Dus: kwam ik u roepen, dan zeg ik ‘ik riep’.
Nu denkt u: van snoepen, dat wordt dan ‘ik sniep’?
Alweer mis, m’n beste. Maar u weet beslist,
dat ried komt van raden, ik denk dat u ‘t wist.
Komt bied dan van baden? Welnee, dat wordt bood.
En toch volgt na wieden beslist niet ‘ik wood’.
‘Ik gaf’ hoort bij geven, maar ‘ik laf’ niet bij leven.
Dat is bijna zo dom als ‘ik waf’ hoort bij weven.

U ziet, onze taal beste dames en heren,
is, net als ik zei, best moeilijk te leren!

So, if the Dutch language really doesn’t make sense and if it’s really so difficult to learn, why bother? I can understand why you might think that way.

One obvious answer would be: you could be required to learn the language because you are going to work and/or live in the Netherlands, or you might be required to have some knowledge of the language for your work. .

But, I think the most important reason would be gratification.

You know, when Dutch people go on a vacation, to get around they either have to know the local language or at least a mouthful of English. Greater problems arise if the local people only speak their language, not a word of English and you have to fumble with a dictionary to get what you need.

But what happens when foreigners travel to the Netherlands? They either expect the Dutch to know their language and will often engage a conversation in Spanish, French, German and when they realise those are not an option, they ask: “Do you speak English?”

I’m not saying we don’t speak Spanish, French or German. Many do… but, also many don’t.

If a Dutch person notices you are actually making an effort to learn a bit of the language, they’ll probably warm up significantly towards you. Many will take great pleasure in helping you as you go along and sure, comic situations may arise, but I have yet to encounter someone who would laugh at another person making a real effort to make them understood. You just might find that a certain door will open for you, while it otherwise might stay closed.

Opening doors for each other, now isn’t that a wonderful reason?